i feel great. I had a happy meal for dinner last night, but my grief is about to be absolved by 45 min to hour of running. Wtf happened to the nice warm weather, man? The scale told me I've lost another 2 pounds in the timespan of a week and 3 days. Nice.
I have my passport, thanks to the bitch snob who works at CVS in Hickory Hollow. She told me the picture looked great, but I'm glad I asked to see it because I looked like a scared chipmunk. I plan on getting on a plane and heading to a brand new world on May 20th.
I need a hobby. I read too much.

I spent about six hours cleaning outside around my lovely home. I'm badass. If a before shot existed, there would be leaves and a woodpile againt the house. And trash and beer bottles everywhere. I also revamped the indoors. Hung up my extensive hat collection.



It's a living room, bedroom and kitchen all in one. Does it get any better? I think not.

go overseas, i will meet more people like myself. people who think they come from out of this world. people who see and feel things they shouldnt. i cannot wait.

I’ve figured out more in the past 2 months then i have been TRYING to figure out for the past 5 years.

1. "i don’t have to look like a freak to be a freak" In other words, whether people want to belive it or not, looks tell alot about what that person is like. Before i was pierced and tattoeed more than i can count. My hair color has been every color under the sun, and my clothes have either resembled a dirty hippy or some emo kid with emotional issues. The point is, the way you look tells people a little of who you are. Juist like i said, if i see a guy with slick black hair wearing girl pants, i think he’s got some emotional issue to go along with it. Am i wrong? So here is the real point and solution i’ve figured out. I know what kind of person i am and i’ll give myself the benefit of the doubt by saying that emotionally stable and pretty down to earth. I’m not a treehugger even though i agree with protecting the enviroment. another worlds i’m not a dirty liberal hippy. So why should i look like one? I’ve realized that the way i look is part of what is attracting bad influences into my life when really that’s not what i want at all. So my solution was: i took out my facial piercings and my hair is brown ( my natural color) for the first time years. I also don’t look like a thirft shop threw up on me. I feel alot better now cause i still have my spunky side, it’s just not displayed to the world. so i feel better. I feel like if i’m going to get anywhere in life i can’t look like a bum.

2. "exercise does make you feel better!". enough said. I was the laziest person in the world. exercise? yeah i hadn’t done that since 10th grade. But hell. Now that i’ve been up and going for 2 months now, i sleep better, i feel better, i go into work singing Tom Jones and people ask.... " did you just get layed?" and i say " no i just rode my bike down here." It’s craziness. i love it.

3. "Having will power isn’t that tough". Not eating a sack full from Krystals really isn’t that hard. Especially when you are up at 6am trying to run. I have so much stuff going for me right now that i can’t afford to eat bad binge drink. Those are only short time pleasures whereas what i’m wroking for is way more long term rewarding than a doughnut.

4. "Real friends don’t blow sunshine up your ass". and that’s that. Thanks Katie for always telling me the harsh truth, even when i didn’t want to hear it at the time. It’s helped me in the long run.

So to sum up all this, i feel fabulous.

The sunshine is enjoyed more when you’re not suffering from a hangover.

AND THAT"S THE DAMN TRUTH!

Do I seem desperate? I am, I need a best friend in the opposite sex variety.
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